Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
