Sry I called you an 8
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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