This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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