In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
