Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
