Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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