Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I think i got beer on your cat.
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