when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
