I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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