Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I deserve this hangover.
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