thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
