walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
