Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I checked into jail on foursquare
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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