look no pants
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
