Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize