i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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