That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
