I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
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