please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
