Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
