Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
