so explain again why im purple
no
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
