I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
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