Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
