So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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