I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
