No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
