they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
