did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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