i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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