he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
