I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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