Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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