You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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