It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
