In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
