Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
