so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
