She said her name was "party"
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
