If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Someone shit on the floor
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
