Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Randomize
