...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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