another moral hangover. fuck.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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