I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
