So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
