Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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