Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
