Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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