just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
