and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
